Grand National Championships: The Motion Picture

Alastair St.Hill played by David Cross

Alastair is the big bald head behind the operation. He's got a lot of great ideas, but a short temper.

Jerrad James McLeod played by Benecio Del Toro

Jerrad's got the street smarts. He takes care of business too dirty for Alastair. He's our IT director, also in charge of Video Game Operations.

Corin LaPointe-Aitchison played by Elvis Perkins

Corin is a big time player behind the scenes of Grand National Championships. He contributes jokes and moral support. When Alastair and Jerrad are low on strength, they drink his Eskimo blood for short bursts of power.

John Niles played by Topher Grace

Niles is a constant source of inspiration to the guys. He's even appeared on the show a time or two.

Arielle Stevenson played by a Cloud of Vapor

We are still not sure what this person looks like. She apparently is the host of Artful Dodgings, a highly entertaining program that airs Tuesday nights on WMNF.

Scott Elliott played by Ernie Hudson

Scott is the quite possibly the only human ever to withstand the brutal boredom assault of an entire Grand National Championships Fund Raising Marathon broadcast and actually tell us that he found it enjoyable. God bless him. Scott's All Souls program airs Friday afternoons from 2-4.

Janeen Wallace played by Kerry Kenney-Silver

Janeen's contribution to the show cannot be measured. Whether it's her strange forays into the World of Warcraft, her critiques of Alastair's impressions, or her heartfelt lobbying to not be played by a white girl in this movie, Ms. Wallace's appearances are anticipated and applauded by the GNC faithful.

Randy Wynne played by John Terry

The puppet master behind Grand National Championships is Randy Wynne. Alastair began his WMNF career assisting Randy during his morning show. Although, once an airshift was available, Alastair took the money and ran, like Anne Heche from Steve Martin. I guess that makes Jerrad like Ellen DeGeneres...or maybe Portia Di Rossi. Oh, and that also makes us gay.

Laura Taylor played by Kyra Sedgwick

A fundraising mastermind, Laura puts her ample talents to work Wednesday nights on Surface Noise.

DJ Arth Mawr played by Terry Gilliam

Tim Peterson is our favorite Welshman. He is a seemingly bottomless pit of semi-useful knowledge. He's taught us about Fantasy Golf and Real Time Viking Re-enactment. He's the svengali who talks us into getting money from the mob to finance our big budget motion picture.

Brigid Ochshorn played by Zooey Deschanel

Brigid is the sweetest thing on two legs. Her unwavering support of the guys help them through many a rough patch.

Joe D'Acunto played by Cedric Yarbrough

Alastair's known Joe since the days at USF, where Joe managed the campus radio station.